Money well spent

Black and Orange Sports Car

I was driving with my teenage son the other day, in very well used old car, and we saw this car parked in a neighbour’s driveway and he said, “Wow that guy must be doing well to have a cool car like that.”

I responded, “Yaa….. I could have had a car like that…. but then I wouldn’t be able to afford you. And I like my investment better.”

“In our quest for more, remember the best investments you can make is in the ones you love.” – Richard Elmes

#kidsareexpensive, #kidsareworthit, #moneywellspent #investinrelationships

Motivational Quote: Trust-Respect-Security

“Where there is no trust, there is no respect. And where there is no respect, there is no security in the relationship.” – Dr. Laura Schlessinger, Popular Radio Show Host and Relationship Expert.

Dating and Sales – It’s not that different

I think we have another convert to the Sales Dating philosophy.

Here is an article by Greta Schulz.    http://www.b2bsalesplaybook.com/clubportal/ClubStatic.cfm?clubID=2173&pubmenuoptID=24674  Greta Schulz is the President of Proactive Training.

Dating and Sales – It’s Not That Different

Remember when you were dating, and you went out with someone for the first time? For example, let’s say you’re female (though the principle applies to both). You really felt from your first meeting with a gentleman that he was charming, romantic, seemed to love kids … you know, different from other guys.

Then you go out on a date. He takes you to a nice dinner at a beautiful restaurant. After you order the meal, he starts the conversation and it sounds something like this:  

“You know, I’m really glad we had an opportunity to get together. I’m so busy with my career that I don’t really date a lot. It’s a shame because I’m really a romantic person and would love to share that side of me more often. I can’t wait until the day when I can settle down and have a family. I would love to have kids and spend all of my time with them. I really want to be a great dad …”  

At this point in the date, if you have half of a brain in your head, you’re ready to bail. Why? These are all of the things you want in someone, right? Right. But this guy is probably none of them. He just told you he is all of these things and more, so why don’t you believe it?  

Because when someone tells you how wonderful he is, especially right up front, do you believe it? Of course not. Besides, if these things were true, he wouldn’t say them. He would demonstrate them. And a wonderful way to do that is to ask about you. He needs to find out what you like, get you talking and stop telling you about him.  

Selling works the same way. Until we start selling to robots, we’re dealing with humans. Human nature is the same, whether it’s personal or business.

“People often make decisions and assumptions from the things we don’t say, not the things we do.” – Greta Schulz  

Am I suggesting you just sit there without talking? Actually, yes. At the beginning, you need to ask and not tell. No one believes how wonderful and terrific you and your product are until they trust you and your word. You have to build credibility.  

Credibility isn’t something you establish by telling someone how great you are or how great your company is. Most of you are saying right now, “Greta, I don’t do that.” Really? Let me demonstrate.  

“So John, why should we go with your product when we have been using ABC’s product for so long and it has worked fine?”  

“Well, Mr. Jones, one of the reasons we stand out is the blah blah blah, and we also have superior customer service and blah blah blah …” Sound familiar? So many of you do this. This is exactly what I’m talking about. You gain credibility by listening. So shut up and listen! Ask some good, solid questions and listen to the answers. Listen for some things that you may be able to help with, then when it’s your turn, use the answers your prospect gave after your questions to compare back.  

Let’s go back to our dating example. What if you went out with this same guy (in this case), and, after dinner, he asked you a few questions.  

“So, you said you’re an attorney. Do you enjoy practicing law? How long have you lived here? Do you have family here? Yes, mine is up north, too. I love it here, but I do miss them sometimes. How about you? I hope to have my own family some day.  

You say: “Really, do you think you’ll be a good dad?”  

“I don’t know, but I hope so.”  

Sound better? Yes, of course. Did you learn something? Sure did. Do you want to learn more? Ask and listen, don’t tell. This is for both on a date and in a sales call. Remember, it’s just about people. Relax, learn, ask and stop selling!

 

Motivational Quote: Challenging Times

This quote is dedicated to Ben Fanelli, a 16 year old Kitchener Rangers hockey player who was injured last night.

Here is the video of the brutal hit that put him in the hospital in critical condition, fighting for his life: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSYQzQPIAjc

“I think a hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure inspite  of overwhelming obstacles.” – Christopher Reeve (aka Superman)

 

The Upside to Dating a Salesman

The following blog post written by Dating Goddess http://www.datinggoddess.com/ on June 24, 2009  talks about why she loves dating men with a sales background.

Does he know how to close? by Dating Goddess  June 24, 2009

I love dating men with a sales background.

Why?

Because they know how to close. How to ask for the order. How to pursue. How to keep clients happy.

“Close” in dating means to ask for your email address, phone number or date. I’ve found a lot of men don’t know how to advance the relationship. Some are way too timid, taking weeks to ask for my number. Some are way too forward, asking for my number after one email exchange.

I understand many men don’t like to exchange a lot of emails. They are either poor typists or poor spellers and feel it takes too long time to say what would take seconds on the phone. But I like to have a few email exchanges to get a sense of a man’s ability to communicate clearly in writing and that he doesn’t get sexual too soon.

Some men seem happy to have a pen pal relationship, stretching the emails out over weeks. This gets wearisome, too. Some men think it gentlemanly to wait until the woman is comfortable enough to offer her number. Other men offer theirs first, knowing some women are not comfortable giving out her number. I prefer a man call me as it shows he has enough interest to pick up the phone. Giving me his number puts the onus on me.

Some women have no problem assertively asking, “When shall we get together?” I don’t like to ask that as I feel a man needs to be assertive enough to ask for the “order” — a date. I don’t want to be the one initiating, at least not at first. I don’t mind initiating once we’ve gone out a few times.

In writing my book on sales, I discovered a common complaint from customers was salespeople who never asked for the order. Salespeople could have an hour-long meeting with the prospect uncovering their needs and constraints, then just thank the prospect at the end, without ever asking for the order. The prospect didn’t feel it was their job to say, “It sounds like you have exactly what I need. How can I order?” They wanted the salesperson to ask for the business.

This is true in dating. If a woman has to prod a man to “ask for the order,” he’s probably not that interested or confident enough.

Salesmen also understand that if they want to secure the “account” (you) they have to make some effort to earn the “business” (your affection). They know they can’t ignore a customer and expect to be received with open arms when they next connect. The customer may have found another supplier (man) to give them what they want. Good salesmen know if you want to keep a customer, you have to give them some attention.

These are basics that every salesperson knows. It would seem common sense, but to those outside of sales it doesn’t appear to be common knowledge — or at least common practice.

The downside of dating salesmen is sometimes they are focused on putting up the numbers — closing the initial deal. If they are used to one-time sales, not ongoing orders, they don’t fully understand the importance of “customer maintenance” — keeping you engaged beyond the initial conquest.

______________

Another example of how Dating strategies and Sales strategies mirror each other.

The 7+ Habits of Highly Effective Husbands – Habit #12: Cherish Every Moment

Effective husbands cherish every moment of their marriage.

Not just the good times (that’s the easy part), but the challenging times as well.

And I know that it won’t seem like it at the time, but those challenging times are really a gift.

They’re a gift because those times are what will mold you into the best husband you can be. Those times are what will move you closer as a couple. And those times are what will provide the wisdom that you can then pass down to future generations.

And how do you get through those rough times?

You laugh!!! You play!!! You hold on!!!

And before you know it, life will be better than ever.

You know that you have picked a wonderful girl. And if you use these strategies that I shared with you in this series of blog posts, she will know that you are a wonderful and effective husband.

So, on that note I believe it is fitting to end this blog series on The 7+ Habits of Highly Effective Husbands with a toast.

To Love, to laughter and a happy ever after.

Also, if you have read one or all twelve of these tips and found them useful, and know of anyone else who might enjoy this series of blog posts,  feel free to send them an email with a link to this blog. That way they can also benefit from this information.

Motivational Quote: Unexpected Opportunities

“It’s in our brokenness that our greatest opportunities are reveiled.” – Dan Allender, Author – Bold Love http://thepathlesschosen.com/