The Ultimate Leadership Opportunity – The Rest of the Story

In my last post, https://relmes.wordpress.com/2009/09/14/the-ultimate-leadership-opportunity/ I started telling you about an awesome leadership opportunity that a friend of mine just received.

And by now you are probably thinking, “Just tell me what it is already.”

Well this excellent position that my friend is embarking in is the position as a father.

And if you think about it fatherhood (and motherhood) is he ultimate leadership opportunity.

It gives you the opportunity to flex your leadership muscles.

It gives you the opportunity to influence your child, who will help shape the future.

And it gives you the opportunity through your child to leave a legacy and make your mark in the world.

What an awesome opportunity.

What an awesome responsibility.

What an awesome job that he will have for the rest of his life.

Good Luck my friend, I am confident that you will be a fantastic Dad!!!

The 7+ Habits of Highly Effective Husbands – Habit #10: Think T.I.M.S. before buying her a gift

Although giving your wife a gift is a great way to show your love, especially if it’s in her favourite currency, if you’re not careful it can still blow up in your face.

Like the time when we were dating I gave my wife April a beautiful red lace rose, not knowing that when you took the plastic off, the head of the rose was really a little pair (and I mean little) of skimpy underwear.

That wouldn’t have been so bad, except that I gave it to her at her birthday party… at my parents’ house.

And that summer when she started talking to me again… (her birthday is in December), she suggested that I needed help.

 And that is when I decided to study and learn the science behind effective gift giving.

A science that has been a mystery to husbands (and sales reps) for years… until now!

 What I discovered were thes 4 elements of effective gift giving that I call the T.I.M.S. factor.

The 1st element it Timing:

A gift that is a surprise is more powerful that one she expects.

You still need to give her a gift on special occassions, like Christmas, her Birthday or your Anniversary, but you may find that she will be just as delighted if you bring her flowers after work on Friday.

But, don’t do it every Friday… because then she’ll expect it which will not only make it less powerful, but if you forget one week she will be disappointed. This is certainly not the emotion you want to generate.

 The 2nd element is your Investment:

And by investment, I don’t just mean the money you spend but also the time and effort you take in thinking about, finding and picking out just the right gift for her.

The more time and effort you invest, the more powerful the gift will be.

Trust me, women know which gifts are bought on December 24th.

 The 3rd element is your Motive:

My research shows that there are 4 different types of gifts.

The “Just because I love you (or was thinking about you)” gift, which is the most powerful.

The “Thank you” gift, which is the next most powerful.

The “Negotiation” gift, which is less powerful, because if you receive something in return it is not really a gift.

And the “Please don’t make me sleep on the couch again tonight, honey” or the “suck-up” gift, which is abviously the least powerful.

 The 4th element of the T.I.M.S. model of effective gift giving is the Sensation that she feels when she gets your gift.

If your gift leaves her happy… you’re golden.

If you have to go out and buy her a “Please don’t make me sleep on the couch again tonight, honey” gift to make up for your original one… not so much.

So remember Habit #10 and think T.I.M.S. before buying her a gift.

Next time, in Habit #11 we will explore how to learn from hundreds of years of wisdom in order improve your marriage.

The Tradition of Champions: The Common thing that all Champions do

He fell to his knees and looked heaven-ward as his teammates sprinted out to congratulate each other in a heap of baseball players that resembled little kids. And in some ways they were little kids.

Little kids that are blessed with the talent to play a game at such high levels that they receive millions of dollars for it.

Who am I talking about?

I am talking about the Philadelphia Phillies Baseball Club right after their ace closer Brad Lidge struck out the Tampa Bay Rays, Eric Henske for the final out to win their 2nd World Series, and first since 1983. http://msn.foxsports.com/mlb/gameTrax?gameId=281027122&refreshRate=30&MSNHPHMA

Both teams played their hearts out and in the locker room celebrations amonst all the traditions which includes lifting the trophy over their heads, putting on the special commemerative gear (T-shirt and Hat) and showering each other with champaigne their is another tradition that almost each and every player cherishes.

The tradition that I am talking about is having the opportunity to thank some of the people (whether it be parents or a little league coach) that helped them get to where they are today. And to be able to do it on National TV with millions of people watching makes the moment even sweeter.

Because nobody, not one player got to where they were today all by themselves. They all had teachers or coaches or friends and family that taught them the game, encouraged them to compete and celebrated their victories (and defeats) with them.

This is true in other endevours, not just sports. In business, mentors can help leaders move to the top of their profession. In families, parents and friends can mentor young boys to become men and young girls to grow up to be mature ladies.

And when you get to the top of your game, remember the tradition of champions and thank those who helped you get there.

Because it is easy for us to say we did it all on our own, but it takes a true champion to share the glory with those who helped them along the way.

The Science of Giving Gifts

 The following tip is from my Guide titled: The 7+ Habits of Highly Effective Husbands.  When you read it think how this psychology may come into play when you are giving gifts to your customers.

The Science of Giving Gifts 

Giving your wife a gift is a great way to show your love, but if you are not careful it can blow up in your face.

Like the time when we were dating I gave my wife April a beautiful red lace rose, not knowing that when you took the plastic off, the head of the rose was really a little pair (and I mean little) of skimpy underwear.

That wouldn’t have been so bad, except that I gave it to her at her birthday party… at my parents’ house.

And that summer when she started talking to me again… (her birthday is in December), she suggested that I needed help.

 

And that is when I decided to study and learn the science behind effective gift giving.

A science that has been a mystery to husbands (and sales reps) for years… until now!

 

What I discovered were thes 4 elements of effective gift giving that I call the T.I.M.S. factor.

 

The 1st element it Timing:

A gift that is a surprise is more powerful that one she expects.

You still need to give her a gift on special occassions, like Christmas, her Birthday or your Anniversary, but you may find that she will be just as delighted if you bring her flowers after work on Friday.

But, don’t do it every Friday… because then she’ll expect it which will not only make it less powerful, but if you forget one week she will be disappointed. This is certainly not the emotion you want to generate.

 

The 2nd element is your Investment:

And by investment, I don’t just mean the money you spend but also the time and effort you take in thinking about, finding and picking out just the right gift for her.

The more time and effort you invest, the more powerful the gift will be.

Trust me, women know which gifts are bought on December 24th.

 

The 3rd element is your Motive:

My research shows that there are 4 different types of gifts.

The “Just because I love you (or was thinking about you)” gift, which is the most powerful.

The “Thank you” gift, which is the next most powerful.

The “Negotiation” gift, which is less powerful, because if you receive something in return it is not really a gift.

And the “Please don’t make me sleep on the couch again tonight, honey” or the “suck-up” gift, which is abviously the least powerful.

 

The 4th element of the T.I.M.S. model of effective gift giving is the Sensation that she feels when she gets your gift.

If your gift leaves her happy… you’re golden.

If you have to go out and buy her a “Please don’t make me sleep on the couch again tonight, honey” gift to make up for your original one… not so much.

So remember the Science of Gift Giving and think T.I.M.S. before buying her a gift.